Friday, July 13, 2012

Miss Information has PMS

So, one of the key symptoms is that Miss Information becomes super helpful and nice to the clients.  It's true, several of them have commented that she's been, god help us, friendly.  It's an act.  Miss Information is using all of her considerable superpowers to keep from lunging across the desk and beating the taxpayers senseless with a tape dispenser.  When she's not helping the public, she sits at her desk and swears.  Even some of her more sweary colleagues have noticed.  One of them suggested earlier that she "chill".  He gets out of the hospital in about a week.

Just in case you're wondering:

 The library has not yet received its DVD copy of the movie Ted.  Miss Information suggests that if you want to see that film you might want to consider going to a movie theatre where it is amazingly still playing, having opened oh, about a week ago.  

Yep, sorry, but you will have to get in the queue for 50 Shades of Grey, because it's the most talked about book of the summer and you know, you are not the only person in the universe. 

Also: 50 Shades of Grey?  This author has clearly never worked in a library.  Does she know how awkward it is to search book titles that start with numbers?  Is it "50" or "fifty"?  And "grey"?  What the hell?  This is one of the few colours that can be spelled two different ways.  Miss Information always spells it "gray" and the system can't find it.  Oh sure, she could search by author name but the bloody system default is a key word search and there are thousands of people named "James" in the library catalogue.

The title "Many Shades of Puce" would have been so much better.

And to add insult to injury, an entire damn cake, fresh from a bakery, was left unattended about 10 feet from where Miss Information sits jonesing for something sweet.  Miss Information would have consumed the whole thing but clearer headed staff members held her back and the patron returned in few minutes.  Bastards.

The only possibility of a violence-free evening rests upon the cultural festival next door which has a stall from one of Miss Information's favourite Indian restaurants.  Unfortunately, it isn't yet open but the hope that Miss Information will be able to get a Kathi Kabab sometime tonight is the only thing keeping her going.