Miss Information

Miss Information is annoyed by a walkie talkie conversation

The library has gotten walkie talkies so library staff can communicate with each other. It has several floors, so the radios help find staff members who are away from their work areas. Of course Miss Information finds some of the conversations she is required to hear annoying. Like today. Staff in the business department had to call for someone to unlock a study room. Staff 1: Backup? Can you please unlock room 6(muffled) Backup: Sorry was that 6B, 6C or 6D? Staff 1: 6(muffled)! Backup: What room? Staff 1: (Sigh) 6(muffled)! There the transmissions stopped. Miss Information assumed that Backup had gone to the desk to speak with their colleague, look at the booking list or possibly just unlocked all the doors. Miss Information would like to remind people of the helpful Nato Phonetic Alphabet. Miss Information likes to make up her own codes based on animals: Anteater, Bison, Chipmunk, etc. The point is this could have been far less annoying if they had used one of these tools!

posted by Miss Information @ 5:51 PM 1 comments

Miss Information is annoyed by an antimasker...well it had to happen.

When Miss Information came for her desk shift at 4, her colleague had news. "There's a person in the children's department who isn't wearing a mask. She described him. When I told him about our mask policy, he just ignored me then he bumped me with his little cart thing and said I shouldn't be talking to strangers. Security is speaking to him now. It seems to be cool." Security returned and said the man had an exemption card. It's probably one of those things people can print from the internet but Miss Information likes problems that are solved so she went about the business of restocking displays. When she went to the returns area an intense conversation between a very upset circ clerk and the branch head was happening. The clerk was describing an interaction with the same man. "Oh, [other librarian] had an encounter with him too," Miss Information said and she returned to her display tidying. She saw the branch head walking to the children's department to talk to the man. Soon there was shouting. Branch Head and man came to the checkout area. The man was annoyed. He didn't want anyone on staff to ever talk to him again. Oh, how Miss Information wanted that too. In fact probably all the staff wanted that. He was marching around shouting and then he spotted Miss Information. He pointed at her. "She's an idiot," he said. "I told her to get out of my way and she wouldn't, so I pushed her. What an idiot. She shouldn't be talking to strangers. I'm a psychologist! Strangers can be dangerous! They could follow her home! Idiot!" And now, after the dust has settled Miss Information remembers Dwight from The Office. In a famous sequence he explained his decision making process like this: "Whenever I'm about to do something, I think, 'Would an idiot do that?' And if they would, I do not do that thing." But Miss Information did not remember that at the time and proceeded to do the idiot thing. Though security tried to stop her she stood up and shouted at the angry man, "Hey, that wasn't me! There was a shift change! Stop calling me an idiot!" The man actually said he was sorry and explained he has bad eyesight. After a bit more shouting he left. He was subsequently banned for two months. So basically if you come to the library and don't want staff to talk you, wear a mask. If you have an exemption all you have to say is "exemption". You don't need to go the shouty disruptive route at all.

posted by Miss Information @ 10:49 PM 2 comments

Miss Information is annoyed by the phone company

Miss Information has briefly taken a break from her "not being annoyed" sabbatical to be really annoyed at a phone service provider.

Long story. Miss Information’s mother moved and now Miss Information would like to cancel her mother’s old landline. Easy, right. Except that Miss Information’s least favourite thing about adulting is making phone calls. Still, has to be done.

The history is that it was Mrs Information’s phone for many years. Briefly, because of some complication, it was the phone number associated with Miss Information’s sister’s business. Then it reverted back to a residential phone but since Miss Information was handling her mother’s finances, it was switched into her name.

When her mother’s house was sold recently and she was making all the cancellation phone calls, she contacted the Giant Conglomerate Phone Company:

Miss Information: Hello, I want to cancel this landline.

Giant Conglomerate Phone Company: Huh. That account is attached to a cell phone that’s been cancelled.

Miss I: Oh, right. I did have a cell phone account with you but I switched providers. I just want to cancel the landline though.

GCPC: But your account is cancelled.

Miss I: The landline still exists but I want to cancel it.

GCPC: But you don’t have an account.

Miss I: Ok, but I’ve been paying the phone bill and I want to stop doing that.

GCPC: It looks like a business account. I will transfer you.

GCPC: Business Support. How can I help you?

Miss I: Hello, I want to cancel this landline.

GCPC: Yeah. Ok. That number is connected to a cell phone that’s been cancelled.

Miss I: Yes, I did have a mobile account with you but I switched providers. I just want to cancel the landline though.

GCPC: But your account is already cancelled.

Miss I: I only cancelled my cell phone. The landline still exists but I want to cancel it.

GCPC: But you don’t have an account.

Miss I: Ok, but I’ve been paying the phone bill and I want to stop doing that. There’s an account number on the bill. Will that help? [gives number]

GCPC: Oh, I see. That’s not a business account number. That’s an account number for a home phone.

Miss I: Right. I already talked to them. They transferred me to you because they couldn’t help.

GCPC: Oh, they can totally help you, just call them back.

So, yes, the Business Department Guy gave helpful advice but Miss Information couldn’t handle talking to the residential people again. She will try tomorrow or the next day, maybe next Monday at the latest.

Several weeks later she tries again:

Miss I: Hello, I want to cancel this landline.

GCPC: Yeah. Ok. That number is connected to a cell phone that’s been cancelled.

Miss I: Yes, I know. I did have a cell phone account with you but I switched providers. I just want to cancel the landline though. It should have been put in my name.

GCPC: But the account with your name was closed.

Miss I: Ok but the landline still exists and I want to cancel it.

GCPC: But you don’t have an account.

Miss I: Ok, but I’ve been paying the phone bill and I want to stop doing that. At one point it was a business phone, but the business department told me to talk to you.

GCPC: I can’t figure out what’s going on. In the meantime, can I interest you in an Internet and TV package?

Miss I: No thanks. I’m happy with my provider. Really I just want to cancel this landline and stop paying the bills for a phone that no longer exists.

GCPC: But our Internet and TV is way better and less money than whoever your provider is now.

Miss I: Just cancel the phone.

GCPC: This is weird. I just don’t understand what’s happening with this account. Maybe it was with the Small Business people. I’ll consult with a colleague. Hold the line, please.

GCPC: Small Business consultant. I see your account here.

Miss I: Great. I want to cancel it.

GCPC: Are you [sister’s name]?

Miss I: No, my sister did have the phone number in her name at one point but it should be in mine now.

GCPC: Well, at one time it was associated with a mobile account which has been closed.

Miss I: Yes, that was my account. I changed providers for my cell phone. I just want to cancel the landline though.

GCPC: No, no, no. Your name is not on the account. [Sister’s name] is the only one who can do this. Let me talk to her.

Miss I: I’m at work. She's also at work...in another part of the city.

GCPC: Well. That’s no good. I can’t cancel it without talking to her since it’s her phone.

Miss I: (mutters under her breath) Hasn't been her phone for years. Listen, I know there’s money outstanding. At least let me pay that.

GCPC: You’re not on the account. I can’t tell you anything about the bill.

Miss I: I’ve been paying the phone bill for years, though. Can’t you let me know how much I owe you? I want to give you money.

GCPC: Not a chance. [Sister’s name] is the only one I can speak to about this.

Miss I: Cool, cool. Great. I'll tell her.

GCPC: By the way, did my colleague tell you about our great Internet and TV packages? Much cheaper than whatever you're paying now.

Miss I: Sounds awesome. I’ll consider it.

Narrator: Miss Information was lying just then. She will never consider doing business with them again.

posted by Miss Information @ 5:38 PM 2 comments

An Update from Miss Information

[Please note: Miss Information wrote this ages ago and posted it to the wrong blog.]

Hi, everyone

And a very special hello to everyone who has commented on the blog over the past few years. Not the spammers. Miss Information hates them and will delete their comments some day.

I'm still working in libraries. The library I'm in now is huge and busy but it's not at all crazy and annoying. I miss this blog but to be honest, I've got no stories to tell.

Perhaps someday I will.

Until then I'm very grateful for everyone who ever read one of my posts--even the people who said I was a terrible librarian.

Till we meet again, I remain,

Miss Information

posted by Miss Information @ 5:37 PM 3 comments

Miss Information is annoyed about printing

The library where Miss Information works has been closed for a renovation. She worked at a branch for a while and then was seconded to a non-public service position for the past 4 months. Today the library reopened. Oh, cool.

posted by Miss Information @ 10:55 PM 8 comments

Miss Information is annoyed away from work

Ok, technically, she's not that far away. She's just down the road on her lunch break. On Saturdays Miss Information usually walks down to Whole Foods and buys a salad but she's done something to her Achilles tendon and although it's better, it isn't quite up to the walk. The library is in more of a business district which means there are more lunch options in the week but the panini place is open, so she goes there. Unlike Miss Information, the customer ordering is not a regular. She needs a lot of explanation and considers her options carefully. She seems disappointed by the choices but it is Saturday and the shop tends to be less fully stocked than the weekdays. 

Miss Information, meanwhile, is delighted at the selection which includes two of her favourite paninis and a new flatbread thing that isn't bad. Still, she gets irritated by the other customer who sighs a lot and finally makes her choice. 

Miss Information orders her panini and pays and then opens her book. The panini cooker thing is slow but that's why Miss Information brought a book. 

The other woman however has a tantrum. "Where's my sandwich? Shouldn't it be done yet? Why isn't it done?" Eventually, her panini is ready and she huffs off to a table in front of the store. 

Miss Information has to wait a couple more minutes and then her lunch is also ready. Yay! 

Leaving the store she walks past the impatient woman who hasn't even unwrapped her sandwich yet. She's just sitting reading a magazine. 

posted by Miss Information @ 5:06 PM 25 comments

Miss Information is annoyed by renovations

The staff area in Miss Information's branch has recently had its washroom upgraded. She hates the changes. Obviously. 

Because the gym change room is inhabited by 6 year olds who DO NOT WANT TO GO SWIMMING, Miss Information often uses that washroom to change from her work clothes into her gym clothes. Her first indication that she and the washroom reno were not going to be friends came when she shook out her yoga pants, accidentally triggered the soap dispenser and had to go to the gym wearing extremely soapy pants. 

So, the soap dispenser is now her mortal enemy but the paper towel dispenser is...what's worse than a mortal enemy--an immortal enemy? She's convinced that it might have the soul of a long dead mime or something. That's how annoying it is. It's handsfree like the soap dispenser. Unfortunately this means Miss Information triggers it by breathing, by moving slightly or by simply existing. It also triggers when she tears off a length of paper towel so the next person ends up with about a metre of towelling. 

Yesterday when she filled the kettle (there's no kitchen in the department so she has to use the washroom), she managed to leave a pile of soap and enough towels to make a tent on the floor. 

So, yeah, she's not adapting to this change very well. 

posted by Miss Information @ 7:06 PM 9 comments

Miss Information has a difficult break up.

Miss Information has had the same cell phone company for a really long time. The salesperson who set up her account initially was a Brachiosaurus. 

Anyway, Miss Information is tired of people mocking her antique phone. Also, she would like data. So, she begins researching the thorny problem. She studies and researches and reads and thinks and asks everyone she knows, then she does some more research. She discovers this: all cell phone plans are basically the same. Some have a lower monthly fee but a higher phone charge. Some have this much data and this many minutes. Others have these minutes and that much data. Some charge this much for going over and some charge that much. When you add up the various details, it comes out to exactly the same price per month--give or take some loose change. Miss Information thinks for a couple more weeks and decides to go with a place that will give her a cool phone and also a whack of bonus grocery points. 

The actual getting of the new phone is pretty simple. She tells the salesguy  what she wants (she's done enough research to be the salesperson at this point); he very helpfully gets it for her and sets up the transfer of her new number. It takes about 10 minutes. 

The guy assures her that she can make calls right away but it might take a few hours for the new phone to get calls....something about getting released from the old contract. 

Miss Information waits 24 hours and still can't get calls. She phones the new people. It's all good on their end. The extremely nice call centre person says that the old guys haven't released her number and she transfers Miss Information to them.

Miss Information tells that nice call centre person that she's got a contract with someone else and she needs her number. He proceeds to offer her awesome stuff to stay (basically, the exact same deal as every other cell company). Miss Information lets him down gently. They've grown apart. She's not the same person any more and she's found someone new. They can still be friends. It's not them, it's her.

Call centre guy thinks she's making a mistake and begs her to stay. She asks for the release of her phone number. He says her phone number is not portable. (This was true when she first got the phone but about a decade ago all phone numbers became portable.) She questions him. 

He tells her that there's a little radio box he needs to click to make her phone number portable but he's not going to do it until she's sure it over between them. Now Miss Information threatens a restraining order. He clicks the button. 

She needs to decompress with coffee. On her way, she gets an actual text! Her phone has been activated. It's going to be the start of a beautiful friendship.

posted by Miss Information @ 7:57 PM 3 comments