Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Miss Information is annoyed by wholesome summer fun

Miss Information hates her damn neighbours. She really has nothing in common with these people. For one thing, she has no designer dog. Also, if she had children, she would not give them a surname instead of a first name--all the children on the street have names that sound like law firms--Mackenzie Benson, Campbell Weatherby and so on.

Saturday was the day of the stupid annual block party. They always seem to be scheduled on her day to work and frankly she's happy with that. This year she was also invited to a very pleasant "thingy" after work, which was so enjoyable that she totally forgot there even was a stupid block party going on.

Everyone else on the street loves the block party. There's lots of happy people hanging around on the road. Stupidly-named children create havoc. This isn't too much different than an ordinary day on the street--except there's a bouncy castle. Oh, and the road is closed to traffic.

Anyway, Miss Information came home around 11. The street was still closed and she didn't want to park on another street and walk to her house. She wanted to park in her own damn driveway. But she could still see people milling about and figured the party was about started 12 hours ago, right? How much partying can people do?

So she went for a cup of coffee, hoping that in an hour the party would be over and the street would be open again. Nope. She did park on another street and walked home. Amazingly, the party continued. In fact, it was in full swing, in Miss Information's driveway. Nice. Thanks for inviting her.

It was a cold evening, how much longer could the singing and dancing continue? Miss Information went inside and waited. And waited. Finally at 3:15 she went out and told the partiers that she was moving her damn car. She thought this might encourage them to get the hell out of her driveway. It did not. She thought she showed great restraint in not running them over. There was some swearing, though.

A couple of days later the nice Scottish woman who lives down the street apologized for hanging around Miss Information's driveway until 4 in the morning. (This is how familiar Miss Information is with her neighbours--she had no idea there was a nice Scottish woman down the street.)

So, anyway, now Miss Information the total bitch of the street. But you already suspected it, right?


At 11:41 PM, Blogger nikkormac said...

can i be in love now?

At 5:42 PM, Blogger Couch Potato said...

Help me Dude, I'm lost.

I was searching for Elvis and somehow ended up in your blog, but you know I'm sure I saw Elvis in the supermarket yesterday.

No honest really, he was right there in front of me, next to the steaks singing "Love me Tender".

He said to me (his lip was only slightly curled) "Boy, you need to get yourself a shiny, new plasmatv to go with that blue suede sofa of yours.

But Elvis said I, In the Ghetto nobody has a plasma tv .

Dude I'm All Shook Up said Elvis. I think I'll have me another cheeseburger then I'm gonna go home and ask Michael Jackson to come round and watch that waaaay cool surfing scene in Apocalypse Now on my new plasma tv .

And then he just walked out of the supermarket singing. . .

"You give me love and consolation,
You give me strength to carry on "

Strange day or what? :-)

At 4:15 AM, Blogger Chris Moonbeams said...

Hi, I was just wandering the blogosphere and here I am at your blog. I enjoy the style of how this all works.

This is one to watch.


marriott time shares


Post a Comment

<< Home