Monday, January 08, 2007

Miss Information is annoyed by academia

For many years, people Miss Information works with, knows and respects have urged her to go back to school and become a librarian. The truth is, she applied once and is still trying to get over the rejection. She carved out a nice place in the paraprofessional end of things and all was cool.

Then a couple of months ago, the library had an anniversary party. Miss Information got to talking with a complete stranger. After a few pleasantries (which didn't include an exchange of names) the man, who seemed pretty sane, suggested that she go back to school and become a librarian.

Yes! A light dawned! This complete stranger who knows nothing about Miss Information is correct! She should go to graduate school! It makes so much sense! Why hasn't anyone mentioned this before?

Oh. Right. They have. Well, anyway the nameless stranger seemed normal enough. He probably knew what he was talking about. Miss Information began planning.

Her academic record is pretty laughable. It doesn't meet the school's (or anyone's) standards--but what the heck? She decides to apply anyway, take a couple of undergrad courses, improve those marks and get accepted by Fall 2008. It's a great plan. She even has a backup plan which involves pressing her face up against the window of the grad building until the admissions committee takes pity on her.

Against all odds, Miss Information manages to re-enroll as an undergraduate for January. Today is the first day of classes. One class is at 2pm and the other is at 6pm. Miss Information who lives about 30 minutes from campus, leaves home at 11am. You never know--something could happen. Nothing happens.

Miss Information is stupidly early for her first class, but that's ok. She has a couple of things to do--drop off that grad school application and get a new student card and that could take some time...It takes exactly 7 minutes.

She takes a walk around campus. The 2pm class is in the pharmacy building and she has no idea where that is. Oh. It's over there? That close, huh?

Hm. She's already familiar with the building holding the 6pm class but she decides to check it out--make sure they haven't moved the street or something. Sure enough, it's right where it used to be--about a 30 second walk from the pharmacy building. With all the pesky logistical issues worked out, Miss Information decides to take a breather. She has heard tell of a coffee shop in the athletic building. It'll kill some time getting there. It kills another 30 seconds.

Dammit! Didn't this campus used to be bigger?

Somehow she manages to kill a chunk of time and makes her way to the pharmacy building. Miss Information makes it to the lecture hall about 45 minutes early. It gives her plenty of time to read the sign announcing that today's class is cancelled.

With 5 hours before her next class she goes to the university bookstore. She can't buy books because neither of her professors have posted their book lists. She visits several libraries. She makes herself familiar with the coffee places and discovers the location of the psychiatric clinic.

Eventually 6pm rolls around. The prof describes the course (10 minutes), answers questions (3 minutes), takes attendance (5 minutes), suggests the class members introduce themselves and get to know each other better. This idea is rejected so class is dismissed at 6:27.

Miss Information remembers why she hated university.

8 Comments:

At 9:15 PM, Anonymous texas friend said...

I love your insight on things! Go back to school. There are plenty of online Master programs out there, you aren't confined to a brick and mortar school. My undergrad grades weren't good either, but my GRE scores got me in after I petitioned the school for a review and spoke with the admission professor.

 
At 8:23 AM, Anonymous Miss Print said...

When Miss Print was a lass at university, pubs held greater attraction than coffee shops. Coffee was brewed and consumed in one's room in residence, with the sole purpose of keeping one awake all night to finish yet another damn paper.

Perhaps Miss Information was killing time at the wrong watering hole, and might have felt better after imbibing an imported pint or two (or three). . .

 
At 9:34 AM, Blogger ActLikeOne said...

I have to agree with Texas Friend. Since you did decide to take the plunge back into academia (yay for you!), consider distance courses. I'm in the middle of one, and it's not bad at all.

 
At 12:48 PM, Blogger Misanthropina said...

Alas! Mefears that there will be fewer library rants now that Miss Information has re-enrolled as a student. And I do not which school it is that she has elected to grace with her presence, but I do know that Distance Ed is taken seriously by not many people around here; perhaps she is wise to go the conventional brick-&-mortar route.

Welcome back to school, Miss Information!

 
At 10:12 PM, Blogger French Panic said...

Beware of the long distance course listserv! The last one I dropped was four years ago, so perhaps them web teachers have managed to moderate things better.

It was supposed to be about graphic novels but quickly devolved into

1. bizarrely long introductions to fellow 'e-classmates' (Hi, I'm from SmallTown, Nowhere and it's been 20 years since I've been in school and I don't talk to anyone evermuch, now here is my life story)

2. scintillating commentary about how difficult it is to parent AND attend school AND OMG, i cant believe our children have the same hereditary disease (because of the life stories being thrown around, you see)

I have no patience and dropped it after a week. The number of boring emails were getting out of hand. Patience is not a virtue I am interested in.

 
At 7:31 PM, Blogger Vanessa said...

Just found your site - you are hilarious! Great that you are in school. I'm in my second semester of the MLS program, so I'll be interested in reading your take on things.

 
At 9:40 PM, Anonymous UnhappySpecialLibrarian said...

I agree with texas! Good luck with your studies.

 
At 4:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am one of those who fear that schooling will ruin Miss Information's finely tuned ear of complaint. However I do acknowledge the fertile fields of academia as fodder for frabbling.

 

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