Miss Information has post-Christmas crankinessMiss Information came back to work yesterday after spending Christmas watch her strangely jaded 5 year old niece open presents--“Oh. Toys. Nice,” she said in a monotone. When Miss Information was a girl, all she got for Christmas was socks and she was happy, dammit.
At the library all is peaceful. It is mainly peaceful because the switchboard phones are malfunctioning and no one can call to ask if the library is open. (And by the way, if you ever call a library and an actual person answers the phone, the library is probably open. So don’t ask if the library is open because that is really annoying. If the library is closed no one answers the phone.)
A couple of her co-workers have come back from vacation, so for the first time in recent memory there are more than two people working at reference and this makes Miss Information really happy—for about 10 minutes. Then they start getting in her way. There aren’t enough computers, there aren’t enough chairs and she keeps bumping into their stuff.
Shortly after the phones break, the dumbwaiter used to transport books from the main level to the children’s department breaks. The payphone is already out of order. Also, the library seems a lot chillier than usual. The elevator is making that groaning noise again.
Around noon the library is infused with the festive scent of ass when the sump pump malfunctions. Strangely, none of the customers complain. Windows are opened. The library gets colder.
Mid afternoon, the sink in the staff washroom springs a leak.
Something is stinking up the fridge. As always there are too many damn cookies in the library and people keep tempting Miss Information with chocolate.
Also, there are no teaspoons.
Miss Information simply cannot work under these conditions.