Friday, December 08, 2006

Miss Information is annoyed by winter

The following story is true. All of Miss Information's stories are true, but some of them may seem fictional. They are not. All of this actually happened.

Miss Information went on a road trip and so took all the unnecessary items out of her car. This means that there is a car seat, hand weights and other miscellaneous stuff in front of her hall closet. Also in front of her hall closet is a big stack of puzzle boxes waiting for a new home.

It is cold. Miss Information has a new coat. Years ago her sister gave her a very nice scarf that would perfectly match the new coat. This requires a trip to the hall closet.

This is what Miss Information did.

--moved car seat
--opened closet door
--opened little container of winter gear
--couldn’t find scarf
--moved puzzle boxes to open door wider
--took container of winter gear out of closet
--moved container into living room, opened it fully, still no scarf
--looked in closet again
--located scarf on the scarf holder thing that hangs over closet door
--tried to move scarf, discovered it was stuck, gave up
--looked for hat, found hat, put on hat
--closed closet door
--put back boxes
--put back car seat
--went into living room, noticed little container of winter gear still on couch
--moved boxes
--moved car seat
--opened closet door
--put container of winter gear back in closet
--closed door
--put back boxes
--put back car seat
--realized: still no scarf
--moved boxes
--moved car seat
--opened closet door
--tried to get scarf, still tangled on scarf holder thing
--detangled scarf from scarf holder thing, thus dislodging scarf holder thing
--re-hung scarf holder thing
--closed door, heard crack
--realized scarf holder thing was out of alignment
--discovered big noticeable chuck of wood was now missing from door frame
--crawled around on floor to locate big chunk of wood
--could not repair without glue, decided to do that tomorrow
--closed door
--put back car seat
--put back boxes
--put on scarf, put on coat, put on gloves
--got into car, realized it was too late to drink espresso in coffee place
--went to coffee place, got espresso to go
--went back to car, fumbled for keys
--dropped almost entire cup of espresso on new coat
--realized only thing in car that could possibly be used mop up espresso is scarf
--opted to leave espresso on new coat
--new coat now permanently espressoed

Luckily it's a black coat and Miss Information loves the smell of espresso in the morning.


At 5:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Reader opines that the scarf holder thing is more properly called the `scarf holder thingie.'

At 3:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The important thing is that you achieved your goal.

You wanted the scarf. You found and wore the scarf. Everything else is just background.

I say sincerely, "Congratulations."


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