Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Miss Information is annoyed because Wednesdays are always annoying

The library has a certain number of computers that are optimistically called the Research Computers. They have Internet access but are filtered so the customers can’t use e-mail or chat websites. They can, however, conduct their very important research using YouTube, online game, or pornography sites. Miss Information just loves research.

Most of the customers prefer to use the unfiltered computers, unless it’s Wednesday when the library tries to live up to the whole “education” part of its mission statement and conducts computer trainings. This severely limits the number of unfiltered computers available to the rest of the population.

The man with the broken leg wanted a computer. Miss Information explained the situation. She could get him a computer, but it would be a filtered computer. So e-mail was out of the question. Did he want a filtered computer? But of course, the man replied. E-mail? Pah. Who needs it? Miss Information found him a lovely filtered computer with a sweeping panoramic view of the Loire Valley and wished him well.

Not so much time had passed when the man called to her. Honestly, Miss Information thought. What’s wrong with his legs? Oh, right. She could see the man’s computer had the “you tried to access a blocked site, dumbass” error message. She realized that she had neglected to mention the filtering of chat sites and asked him if he was trying to go to one of those. No, said the man with the broken leg. He was trying to open Hotmail. Some people have no long term memory. It had been about 2 minutes. Miss Information reminded him of their previous conversation. E-mail was not available on the filtered computers, so therefore the man could not use Hotmail. But the man protested, he didn’t want to use Hotmail. He just had to read an e-mail in his Hotmail account, because somebody had sent him a link to a website that he wanted to look at.

Miss Information refrained from beating the man senseless with his own crutches and wondered if his leg had been broken by a frustrated library staff member.

5 Comments:

At 8:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

No matter what your teachers or parents or whomever told you. Yes, there are stupid questions.

 
At 1:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Amen, sibling.

 
At 5:23 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Reader fully understands the gentleman's confusion. To look at something is different from using it.

For example, consider Penelope The Pole Dancer down at Meow's Kit-Kat Klub. One is welcome to LOOK at Penelope until one's eye's bug out. One, however, may not USE Penelope. (Well, not till she gets off work, anyway.)

In the future, The Reader hopes Miss Information will exhibit a bit more patience and explain to the library patron that he may neither use NOR look at certain unavailable functions.

 
At 11:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

quote: "The Reader fully understands the gentleman's confusion. To look at something is different from using it." blah blah

um after telling people the same thing a million times a week...who really has time to be patient...besides...ppl should freaking read the LARGE and colourful signs, located above the monitors of each computer and pay attention when someone is helping them. >:p

 
At 3:09 PM, Blogger Marvelous said...

Awww sigh.hahah

 

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