Saturday, September 17, 2011

Miss Information is annoyed by the nervous

The library hosts a film club. Once a month a bunch of people get together to watch a movie and discuss it. It seems lovely and civilized. Miss Information has never been. The movies don't have enough explosions for her. She does have to field questions about the films, however.

"This movie, The Dresser? What's it about?"

Before Miss Information converted to her policy of only watching movies with car chases and exploding robots, she used to indulge in the occasional arty flick. So she's actually seen The Dresser. She can't remember much but tells the woman that it's a nice movie about an actor and his wardrobe guy.

The woman is not convinced. The title bothers her. "Sounds gay. Is it gay? 'Cause the title makes it sound kinda gay."

Miss Information can't really remember. She doesn't classify the movies she watches into categories like "gay", "kinda gay", "not gay". Of course the exposition in exploding robot movies is not always the best. So she consults the Internet Movie Database. The word "effeminate" is mentioned.

Miss Information tries to be reassuring. The description doesn't even hint that there's any sex in the film but the woman is not reassured. She's been fooled before. Movies don't sound at all gay and then she watches them and all of a sudden--GAY. All over the place.

At this point Miss Information gives up and tells the woman that perhaps she'd better skip this movie if she's that worried. Miss Information kind of thinks maybe the woman should skip all movies from now on and just move to a cave but whatever. It's an important lesson: The next time someone asks Miss Information whether a movie is "too gay" for them, the answer is going to be "yes". It doesn't matter whether the movie is Saving Private Ryan or Bambi. They are all too gay for you woman.

In fact, Miss Information refrained from pointing this out but the library is probably too gay for this patron.


At 1:15 AM, Anonymous Soos said...

Probably. One woman's gay maybe another's kinda or not.

At 8:49 PM, Blogger Prodigious1One said...

Hi, Miss Information! I love your humor! The dry wit is great! I'm a librarian in training so I appreciate your humorous subtleties about the public library aspect of the profession. Keep on rockin'!



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