Miss Information is annoyed by odours
Miss Information was trapped at the reference desk on Friday night because for some reason everyone who used to work at the library has gone...somewhere...Well, they may come back some day. Miss Information is saving their chairs for them. About an hour into the evening shift, a guy came in and set up shop right across from the reference desk. He pulled out some magazines that he had brought with him and read until closing.
Not that there's anything wrong with any of that. The problem was that the man smelled like ass. Seriously. He smelled like he was past due for a diaper change. He was gag-worthy.
Miss Information tried to come up with a nice way to tell him to go away, but quickly realized that if she got close enough to actually speak with him she'd probably throw up.
On the way home, she had a sudden horrible realization. Miss Information was sitting between the branch head and the smelly guy all night. What if the branch head mistakenly assumed that Miss Information was the source of the odour? Neither of them mentioned it.
Just to clarify--Miss Information does not smell like ass.
5 Comments:
I seriously doubt that the branch head thought it was you being all smelly. I just can't even imagine that. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure - if anything - the boss thought you did well to bite your tongue. You may have even earned some brownie points... as opposed to brownie pants. Ew.
Been a while, but The Reader has returned. He's thinking about starting his own Blog. Miss Information has inspired him. Needs to think of a Blog name. Then he'll have to think of something to write about.
Though he admires Miss Information's writing style, the Reader will probably not refer to himself in the third person. Imitation is flattering, sure, but one man's flattery is another man's plagiarism
The Reader predicts his biggest obstacle will be appropriate content. Unlike Miss Information, he doesn’t have an interesting job dealing with the public. He works from home and spends his day staring at a computer screen. He has no skill or ability other than breathing and taking up space. The only musical instrument he plays is the radio.
The Reader does get annoyed quite as often as Miss Information, but over entirely different matters. This morning, for example, he was annoyed because there were no bananas. The Reader begins every day with a banana, a cup of coffee, and a newspaper. When any one of the three is missing, he gets annoyed. When two are missing, he is positively apoplectic. One hopes the world never learns what happens when all three are missing.
The Reader will ponder the idea of a Blog for a short while longer. Whatever happens, he wishes to thank Miss Information for providing her entertaining and informative Blog.
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Not even possible. Your branch head sees you all the time and you do not smell like ass. Therefore... it was the hobo reading the magazines. End of story. What an awful way to spend the day, though. Yeesh.
I think every library employee has, at one time or another, checked the visible ventilation system for evidence of a decaying corpse.
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