Friday, April 20, 2007

Miss Information is annoyed by her fellow coffee drinkers

Miss Information is off work this week and she has a really big essay to write. She is determined to write a really great paper and get a really excellent mark. And so she has spent every waking minute drinking coffee in Starbucks, working out at the gym and watching hockey.

Sigh. Academia is just so hard.

Anyway, she has a message for the other inhabitants of Starbucks:

Miss Information is not a freaking bus boy. She is sick and tired of having to clear off previously owned cups and plates and stuff before she gets to sit down and enjoy her peaceful coffee. You can not have failed to notice that Starbucks, as lovely as it is, is not a 5 star restaurant and they don't have a lot of wait staff. That is why you have to actually go to the counter and get your own refill. And it's not like those paper cups get washed and reused. See, it isn't actually that hard when you finish drinking to pick up your debris and take it to one of the conveniently situated garbage disposal unit thingies which if you look carefully are located right next to the door. You were going that way anyway, and your cup isn't nearly as heavy as it was before you drank whatever was in it and you managed to carry it all the way over from the counter.

Also, after you have moved your cup you may notice that that table is not quite as pristine as it was when you arrived. Miss Information would be ever so grateful if you could take a moment and wipe up any spillage that may have occurred. Also crumbs are not that heavy. It takes very little strength to brush them into the very cup that you are about to throw out.

As for you environmentalists who get your coffee* in a "for here" cup. Miss Information admires your commitment. She used to do the same, but she likes her coffee piping hot and those ceramic mugs just don't do the trick when you are spending hours lingering over a cup of coffee in essay avoidance manoever #6. Anyway, you obviously can't throw those out, so your task isn't quite as easy as that of those planet destroying bastards. But still. Obviously you got your coffee* at the counter and you know that those baristas are going to need it back eventually. So just walk it over to them. They aren't scary or anything. It isn't that far. See, because if you don't the next person, probably Miss Information, is just going to have to move it herself. And it really irritates her.

*Substitute whatever fancy ass drink you prefer--except when Miss Information talks about her coffee, she means coffee--not soy based, half sweet, extra foamed anything, just plain coffee or maybe tea.


At 2:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You watch hockey? Miss Information watches hockey? Right on, eh!

At 3:59 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

And I love French coffee drinkers!


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