Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Miss Information meets an evil bitch queen

Miss Information was determined to start off 2005 with a new attitude. Certainly she has learned from the recent horrific events that life is precious and every day is to be celebrated.

Well, fuck that shit. Today was her regularly scheduled, always traumatic, circulation desk shift. Nothing too terrible had happened before she went on break. Well, obviously she had disregarded several key procedures and overlooked library policy, thus breaching employee ethics on several (less than ten) occasions. But, so?

When she tore herself away from the delightful coffee-like substance available in the staff room and returned to the desk she discovered that the cash-register was malfunctioning. Not her fault, by the way. Somebody else broke the thing.

While other, more competent, employees attempted to breathe life into the machine, Miss Information got on with helping customers. Most of them were charming people you would be happy to meet in dark alleys. Not surprisingly when they were told they would have to pay their library fines on another occasion, they were overjoyed. Several of them danced merry celebratory jigs--and were promptly thrown out of the library (dancing is strictly against the code of conduct).

There was this one woman, however... When she was told that she would have to pay her fines another time, she threw a complete fit. It seems that she had made a special trip to the library to return her books and Miss Information was inconveniencing her terribly by suggesting that she come back another time. The nerve.

Miss Information refrained from pointing out that the woman's books were a couple of days late already. If she hadn't made a special trip today, the fines would have been higher tomorrow. Not to mention that the woman was renewing a book, so she was destined to come back at some point. At any rate, Miss Information ignored the woman's obvious sociopathy and suggested that she pay the fine when she returned the books she was taking out today. But the woman insisted that this would cause undue hardship and demanded that Miss Information waive the fines as a good will gesture.

Like that was ever gonna happen. Miss Information was all out of good will.

Miss Information has had people mad about paying fines. She had had people who are mad about amount of their fines. She never imagined that there were people in the world who would be angry because the damn cash register is broken and they couldn't give us money. How horrible. You get to keep that money. What a tragedy.


At 8:31 PM, Blogger Miz J said...

This ranks right up there with 'I shouldn't have to pay the fine because you didn't call me to tell me that my book's overdue.' It's pretty amazing to watch people draw convoluted logic circles to get out of a 60 cent fine. I actually had a guy tell me he shouldn't have to pay a fine because nobody told him the library'd be closed on Christmas day.

Last time I checked, I wasn't working on Mars.

At 9:56 AM, Blogger nichole said...

Yes, the classic "phone me when my book's overdue" line. Even better are the folks who want this service, and still get all their notices mailed. 37 cents to collect 10? Who would do that?


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