Saturday, June 15, 2013

Miss Information thinks people should get a clue

This week one of the elevators at the library was malfunctioning. No one told Miss Information directly but she saw that it was festooned with yellow caution tape and used her awesome powers of logic to determine that there was something wrong with it. 

Not everyone is so blessed. As she sat at the information desk, she was inundated with questions. Well, one question--can I use that elevator?

Hm. Let's see. In order to use that elevator you would either have to unwrap the caution tape or crawl around it like Catherine Zeta-Jones avoiding lasers in that jewel theft movie, so no, you can't use it.

Tired of this nonsense, Miss Information took Friday off to go to a concert and mingle with hipsters. Unfortunately she was in the alcohol free section because she made up a great drinking game. Hipster beard? Drink. Hipster glasses? Drink. Hipster hat? Drink. All three? Chug, chug, chug! She'd have been unconscious in no time but then she would have missed conversations like this:

Woman 1: (asking about her friend's new, large and tragically ugly Day of the Dead skull tattoo) How long did that take?
Woman 2: Well she started at 3 and I didn't get out of the chair until 7 so, like, 5 hours!

No one in the group corrected her math. Miss Information was tempted but decided against when she realized that she will never escape the stupid people.


At 3:54 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just discovered your blog last week, and I just want to say how awesome it is to know that the daily headaches with patrons are not unique. Makes me feel like I'm not alone haha. Quick incident to share re: patron dumbness. One of our computer monitors overheated and there was a sign taped onto it which said "out of order". Naturally I was asked at least ten times if the computer could be used. Oy. haha

At 3:45 PM, Anonymous Anne said...

My theory is that some people have formed the opinion that they no longer have to think once they enter the library. Isn't that what all those people behind the counters are supposed to do for them? They can safely leave their powers of observation at home. Also their library cards. Because why would they need to bring those with them to the library?

At 3:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

People just aren't very bright. Today there was a lady complaining, I thought, that the holds were out of order. But what she was really saying was that the her hold wasn't at the end of the first shelf, it was near the beginning of the second, because the are organized by last name so her's is always at the end of the shelf. The top shelf. Not the bottom shelf. And it's always been organized by last name, which it never has and not by last 4 numbers of the library card number, which it always has.


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