Thursday, September 24, 2009

Miss Information is annoyed by an author visit

Miss Information woke up with an evil bastard cold and the knowledge that due to circumstances beyond her control, she was conducting today’s author visit. She decided to make the most of it and dress female for once. She must have been feverish.

The program got off to a bad start when she neglected to unlock the outside doors based on the assumption that people coming to a library program would come through the library. Bad mistake. Among those unable to get in was the author himself who was a really good sport about it. Eventually a woman came in and glowered at Miss Information until she got the message.

Her hopes of making friends with the regulars now abandoned, she introduced the author and sat down. He was funny. The audience was responsive. A little too responsive maybe. One gent in the first row kept asking questions. The author didn’t mind but the lady in the second row took exception. She started out by quietly glaring, then moved on to swearing. It was then that Miss Information noticed that the woman was holding her pen in a particularly menacing way and she began mentally composing the incident report which was sure to follow. Great. Miss Information gets to do one program in her life and it ends in a stabbing. Perfect. The man must have sensed something because he suddenly ran out of things to say. Good idea, pal.

And the author? Miss Information liked him. She must have. About 30 minutes into the presentation she realized she was flashing him. Stupid low-cut shirt.


At 4:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

EVERY program has that one weirdo who either asks too many questions, or tries to take the whole presentation in a completely different direction. I usually try to light them on fire with my mind. (So far, no luck.)


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